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Stay at home mum, previously top PA in various top companies for top bods. Want to be a writer instead.

Sunday, 19 February 2012

Am I boring you? - The Pie Chart of Worry

It's true I am a bit of a worrier. I think most women are really and that part of us just hypes up a 100 times when we become mothers. That is my theory anyway. Since my daughter was born I have had bad dreams almost every night I think. Mostly where she is represented by a kitten or a tiny doll or something like that and I forget I've got her and she falls down the toilet or out of the window...

That was a bit heavy wasn't it? Sorry. Anyway, this is another post about worrying. Its not my appearance this time. The other worry on the top of my hit list is “Am I boring you?”

There have been lots of social situations in the last year that have made me ask that question. I sit there quietly with friends I've known for years, racking my brains to see if I can add something to the conversation that doesn't start with my daughter as the subject.

I'll get over it. I think I'm still feeling like a newbie at all this and sooner or later I will believe that I don't need a job to validate myself or to be interesting company.
I did confide in a friend about this once. She asked “Well, did you talk about work alot before?” Honestly I don't think I did. I have never really thought that talking about the ins and outs of your work place would be of interest to anyone but you and perhaps your work colleagues, so I've never really done it.
The trouble with this mind set is that my life has altered totally by giving up work, you of course have your original set of friends who are there for your sanity and to remind you who you are (literally and metaphorically), but then you need mummy friends too. You need them to do things with, so that you can see and speak to adults during the day. Which means you have to go to play groups and make an effort to chat.

I mean, seriously, who might want to be friends with a 35 year old woman who wanders around muttering “its Wednesday, right? I'm sure it was Tuesday yesterday...” then counts off the days on her fingers to check. Or – the fool proof way, check Sky Planner for what programmes are on that day. “Sopranos”. Definitely Wednesday!

Is it terrible that now I've started going to these play groups, that when I meet the other (usually) women at these things, I'm secretly pleased when they are a bit boring and can only really start a conversation by saying “so, how old is yours then?” Ahhhhhh, big exhale. Its not just me.
For funzie's I created a pie chart of my worry list. What would your pie chart look like?
I'm a bit worried – is this blog boring?

Blue: My appearance/grey hairs
Red: Is my child happy/safe/normal
Yellow: Money
Green: Massive global disasters
Burgundy: Am I a bore?


  1. I firmly believe that when you have a child, they take your old brain away and give you a new one that works ENTIRELY DIFFERENTLY to the one before. And, yup, in this new brain, our children are right there as the number one most interesting thing in the whole world. We should probably have words with Mama Nature about that if we ever catch up with the bitch.

    I honestly doubt that you are boring. Chuck Wendig cracks me up when he talks about his kid on twitter. Definitely keep on with the writing. Then people can think you are nuts instead. :)

    Edit: Aargh! Fricking capcha words. I'm human and that's probably why I can't read the wretched word! Rosie mad now. Rosie smash.

    1. Erm - you forgot your partner on your PIE chart - OMG how could you - the Father of your child

  2. Love this post! I am so with you on the worry about being a bore... I too left a busy career to be a SAHM and do sometimes wonder where my brain has actually gone...

  3. Like the worry chart, and as Sue (my better half for those who don't know me) says "a mother has to worry about their kids" and that's when she's talking about the oldest ones who are teens and above. Not sure what my worry chart would look like but appearance isn't in there, and your other half has convinced me I'm boring so I don't need to worry about that so much as it's a done deal.
    Global disasters shouldn't be a worry, if they happen they happen and worrying can't change it before the fact. I take comfort in the fact that us Proles will be the ones needed to rebuild for the elites after they screw it all up.
    All I can offer in the way of advice is just be you and your friends will still be there, if they're not then they weren't your friend anyway.

  4. Thanks for the comments my friends x